It Wasn't Love

It Wasn't Love is an autobiographical account of an affair with a stranger. We don't actually know who is telling the story though, a male or female. In some shots, we see a girl with blond curly hair and in others we see what we think is a boy with facial hair. It is never quite clear what sex the narrator is. The voice is also ambiguous. Knowing that Sadie Benning is a lesbian though, I would tend to think that the narrator is a girl and that she is speaking about an affair she had with another girl. But one thing that I do know is that this film is about a romantic affair between two strangers. It begins with the narrator telling us about "yesterday night". A "bad girl" had picked the narrator up and they were driving to Hollywood. But they never quite made it there. They parked in a fried chicken restaurant parking lot and "made out". Then they drove back and the girl dropped the narrator off at home. In the last few shots we see the words "It wasn't love, but it was something".

This film was made using the Fisher Price camera that Sadie Benning's father gave her and it lived up to the expectations I had about Pixelvision. The picture was black and white and it was very grainy. The shots weren't clear and you could also see the pixels move on the screen. Even though the video quality wasn't spectacular, the film itself said a lot. We, the audience, get the feeling that we are listening to a diary entry. We feel personally attached to the narrator and know that this story is very personal and meaningful to her.

I believe that Sadie wants to show the world just how confusing life can be. Life is also not as simple as we would like to think. Homosexual relationships are just as confusing as heterosexual ones and homosexuals have the same desires and fantasies as heterosexuals do. I also think that Sadie believes there is no line that we can draw between males and females. We shouldn't label someone with either of these titles. We are who we want to be and we shouldn't be categorized. Even though Sadie was only 19 when she made this film, I believe she was wise beyond her years. She says so much without saying anything at all.
-- Alyssa Miklinevich, 2001

Sadie Benning Work